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Hi there! I’m 22 (f) and started at a big company about 4 months ago as a management trainee. The hiring process was extremely competitive and had about 400+ applicants but only 2 got hired with one of them being me (yay!). The thing I am struggling with is the following: I feel super insecure at work and I question my own intelligence constantly. I already talked about this with my coach we got from work and my manager (who truly has the best intentions with us). I know exactly what my issue is, I am scared to fail which came from my past issues I never truly resolved and now in this traineeship where you’re constantly self reflecting and focusing on growing as a person it’s all coming back. I don’t know how to deal with these feelings I haven’t had to deal with in so long. I feel super weird and not like myself, I struggle to be myself, to feel secure in my answers, I can feel myself tense up when I’m in a setting where I feel insecure. This is an extreme polar opposite to how I am outside of the 9-5. I rarely ever feel shame for who I am, what I wear or what I say. I am proud of who I have became in the past 22 years and am super positive and rational. But at work that all goes out the window. Anybody who have had similar experiences and knew what to do? My coach said: Fake it till’ you become It, which I’ve been trying to do but; easier said than done.
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